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VICE's guide to being a racist

I was just reading about one of the founders of VICE, Gavin MacInnes. VICE always felt mean spirited. I got it, it was pushing the boundaries, it was there to shock. If you were a teenage boy in the nineties you loved it because it was offensive. Now this dude is one of the founders of the proud boys racist club. And rants and whines about censorship. The thing about racists is they often couple their beliefs in the name of free speech. As if their beliefs are new and radical and need to be heard. But ya know, hatred has been given centuries and centuries of airtime. You can spout racism, but most people just don't want to hear it anymore, and don't want to promote it or give it a platform. It's go nothing to do with free-speech. The world is moving on without you and you're scared. You've identified your whole existence with your gender or your skin colour, and if those things don't have value anymore, than you don't have value. Peace out shock jocks.

The Void

I used to yell into the void, and then wait for a response. Now I don't wait for a response, I just keep yelling.

NXIVM

If the leader of your cult looks like a cult leader you're in a cult.

Let's explain that last one a bit better

Why is this full circle, why does it matter? Damon Albarn is the creative force behind Blur and Gorillaz, two groups that I often go to for inspiration to create my music. In an attempt to move outside of my usual sources of inspiration to some weird-ass soundtrack from a strange throw-away 90s horror-comedy, I find out that I am in fact, finding inspiration in the same place as I always have. It's similar to finding out that Ennio Morricone wrote songs for The Clash.

Full Circle

It only took me two decades to discover that the strange gem of the Ravenous soundtrack, that I was just about to rip-off was co-written by Damon Albarn.

Like it enough

So that if no one else likes it. You still like it.

Watching a little TV for a change?

I always think of this line from Back to the Future Part 2 when I open up Crave, Netflix, and Prime Video in my browser to figure out what the hell I'm going to watch.

Not strange enough

TV shows and movies need to get weirder to move beyond real life.

Teen angst

I’ve started revisiting a lot of the music I listened to when I was in high school and I’m starting to think I was depressed back then.

Time out

Time out on everything for a while.

real or not

Everything is real. Because thoughts and ideas don't have these limitations. And that is what the world is made of.

Roland

Roland is the Nintendo of musical instruments. Don’t argue with me on this because you can’t and I’m right in every way.

remember that time

You picked up your phone and used it to complete the one task that you had originally picked up your phone for, and then you put your phone down right away?

Superhero films vs Comedians

"They have blighted cinema, and also blighted culture to a degree". - Alan Moore on Superhero films

I don't completely disagree with this statement. I think an overemphasized trend in any direction can have a negative effect on culture. And superhero movies have had such a catch-all mass popularity effect on culture. Sometimes I miss watching a movie and being surprised, it is so rare now to see auteurs that stand out. Everyone is looking to be a cog in the MCU or Star Wars Universe. And many of these films are great rides. But to actually be confronted or challenged about how we process the extreme situations we currently live in has become more and more rare, especially in film. That challenge now seems to be left mostly to the comedians, Bill Burr, Dave Chappelle, Tom Segura, Eric Andre, Michael Che and others. They are the only ones achieving this with an artistic method, and by that I mean to the point where they dare you to see things from their perspective. Comedians are the only ones confronting dangerous topics without fear and convincing you to look deeper at situations you may have already casted judgement on. Popular film and television no longer attempt this.

passwords

A memorial for your favorite pets.

How to make art

Keep adding stuff until there’s too much stuff, then start taking stuff away.

The news

Addictive and repulsive at the same time.

Schadenfreude

In general we don’t wish harm to others. But sometimes people are kind of asking for it.

The Unbreakable Ted Lasso

At first you were like, yeah I don’t care much for British accents. And then you realized you were insane.

When you’re Mickey Rourke

You don’t play by the rules, and you sure as hell don’t take orders from Nick Cannon.

No one

Who’s excited about virtual staff Christmas parties?

Wake up

Sometimes I like to imagine Wyn Butler screaming “I invented the millennial whoop!” The same way that Will Ferrel screams “I invented the piano key necktie!” In Zoolander.

pathetic

What’s with the ‘T’s in the middle of the word ‘mittens’? There’s two of them and they still can’t get the job done.

Utopia

20 minutes in and I'm realizing that the series is about an artist predicting the future, while the series itself has predicted the future. Oh and "Friends of P" by the Rentals just played. I'm sold.

A murder of crows

An assassination of elephants and a vehicular manslaughter of parakeets.

Schitts Creek

The US is so fed up with itself it voted for a Canadian TV show to win every award. Now to give Trailer Park Boys a posthumous Lifetime Achievement Award.

Right answer, no reason

I make websites for a living and apps for fun. Coding is satisfying because it is abstract problem solving, the answer is usually not up for debate, it either works perfectly or not well, or not at all. So when you do find the solution there’s a bit of magic, a eureka moment. Today I found a solution to a problem I had spent hours on. The solution works perfectly, like magic, but makes absolutely no sense to me. I came across it by guessing, just throwing the dice after trying everything else. I still don’t get it, maybe I never will, but does it matter? Sometimes magic is magic.

Filling a void

I make music because a lot of the stuff I want to listen to hasn’t been made yet. Someone’s gotta do it.

Somewhere between an immortal Jellyfish and a Unicorn

Meeting a celebrity is surreal. Like finding out Unicorns are real. Or jellyfish are immortal. I guess it’s more like the latter, because jellyfish are immortal. But somehow an immortal jellyfish is less impressive than a horse with a horn on its head. And a celebrity is somewhere in between.

Top 5

Although I’m only a casual hip-hop listener, here’s my top 5 in no order:


Killer Mike

Guru

Jay-Z

Eminem

Andre3000

I Like this job, I like it!

One of my favorite performances in any movie is Heath Ledger as the Joker. He took a character so over the top and he grounded it, made it real. Even when actors play real life historical figures it can seem fake, overdone. Even an actor playing an average person can seem fake and overdone. Heath Ledger’s Joker was real. I find myself continually trying to find the cracks, like analyzing special effects for flaws, and I can’t.

A Student Again

When I was first getting into music I would accept every musical choice the artist made without question. They were the authority and I was there to learn. I sang along to every silly line and air guitar'd to each and every indulgent solo. As I get older, it is rare that I do not have an opinion on the choices made by an artist, or even would make a different one. Years ago I was discussing with a friend of mine how I can still appreciate an artist even though I believe my work to be superior. That remains true. But how sweet it is to become the student again, and embrace every choice made as infallible scripture.

New mantra

Have enough going on in your life that you don’t have time to think twice.

Think about it

The guy who wrote Who Let the Dogs Out is a millionaire.

Cancel culture

The agreement that an angry mob will decide on the one person who will pay for the sins of many.

NYE

I predict a whole lot of “Good Riddance” and “Fuck 2020” parties.

Crazy Genius

Our son used to say “you are crazy”, now he fluctuates between “you are crazy” and “you are genius”. I’ll take it.

When you’re too busy

Hoping that some hands off parenting is beneficial to a child’s development.

Thanks big tech

Google sent me a free nest mini, because I signed up for Spotify Duo, and while I know they just did it to spy on me. I can still appreciate an unexpected gift. Thanks big tech.

the agreement

A child holds you to your highest standard before they even say a word.

The deadline

My new mantra is: “the deadline is more important than the product, because consistency is more important than anything”. I would have thought this sacrilege a few years ago, now it’s my only truth.

True facts

In Japan the block numbers are used as identifiers and the streets don’t have names. This is where bono got the idea for the song, he was only talking about Japan.

Everything is a hoax

Which means hoaxes are hoax, which means hoaxes are actually real. The earth is flat if you’re close enough to stand on it.

Super Castlevania IV

I also have a vivid memory of my older brother telling me that one day I would be more into music than I was into video games. And me saying, that would never happen. Things change.

Spinning Bird Kick

Watching High Score on Netflix, realizing how long it took for character choice to be implemented into video games in a main-stream way, here are a few of my characters of choice:

Street Fighter II: I started out with Chun-Li, moved to Guile, then it's been Ryu ever since.

Mortal Kombat: Began with Sub-Zero and eventually moved to Scorpion.

Mario Kart: I started with Toad, and eventually landed on Yoshi.

kid dracula

When Kid A came out I was reading Bram Stoker's Dracula that year and would listen to Kid A and OK Computer while reading it. I couldn't believe how well the music fit with the mood and themes of that novel, it felt like a soundtrack to Dracula. When I moved to Toronto many years later I saw posters up for screenings of Nosferatu with Radiohead's Kid A and OK Computer played overtop as the soundtrack. Yesterday, my wife and I were discussing how much we connected with Arcade Fire's The Suburbs as a road trip soundtrack for travelling out of the city, through rolling hills and through smaller towns towards a destination. Whatever incredibly personal synchronistic experience you are having with a piece of art there are many others out there enjoying the same experience you are.

neutron dance

My mom used to workout to 80s music. Now I workout to 80s music. The 80s holds the monopoly on music to workout to, and have ever since...well...the 80s.

the pinnacle of popular culture

You can tell someone's age by what they deem the pinnacle of pop culture, for me it's seasons 7-9 of The Simpsons.

news radio

This might be the most underrated of sitcoms.

The Strokes are the Beatles of my generation

Julian is John, Fabrizio is Paul, Albert is George, Nikolai is Ringo and Nick Valensi doesn’t count. Correction, Valensi is Yoko. Never mind, this is a terrible comparison.

Paper

There is a mountain of post-it notes filled with tasks I have forgotten todo. There's a few in there that were probably worth doing, but most are just paper.

RvB

A lot of sci-fi and comic-book action movies can be reduced to red team vs. blue team.

Self-reliance

A subtle feeling of disconnect remains as our world opens up again. Maybe it's just remnants of a loss of innocence. We will no longer trust the status quo or institutions again. Self-reliance is the only strength.

A word of advice

Don’t read about the fateful end of Grizzly Man the week prior to camping.

Camping

I came to the realization years ago that camping is just drinking in the woods. It’s also not being able to sleep well in the woods.

Step aside

Get the hell out of my way, me! I got things I gotta do!

Revisiting Radiohead’s King of Limbs

Realizing that King of Limbs is a groove based album similar to Remain in Light by Talking Heads. The vocal melodies are in parallel with the instrumentation, never impacting the established rhythm directly.

Prehistoric Creatures

Thom Yorke, I can listen to you sing about dinosaurs and weird fish all day.

conundrum

I am very aware of how people may react to what I say. I'm not worried about offending anyone, but I don't want to contribute negatively to what exists. But also, I can't control how other people will react anyways. This is a conundrum.

Laughter of the dead

Canned laughter always unnerved me. I always heard the dead quiet of the studio underneath it, and was always made aware that some of these people laughing had died years before. This wave of every playoff season for every sport is a welcome return to some form of past unifying entertainment, but why hide the fact that these are strange times with the sound of a synthetic crowd funneled in? Can we not see the stands are empty? Are we not fully and completely aware of our current situation? Why not experience every part of this strange moment and embrace it as unique? With teams wearing jerseys with political messages on them and teammates wearing masks is there any point in trying to comfort us and pretending that we still live in the past? We’ve watched Jimmy Fallon host the Tonight Show from his house, and entire SNL episodes performed over Zoom. There’s no going back now. We’re here, and it’s happening now, phony doesn’t fly with this crowd.

I forgot about this record

Just said aloud to myself "I forgot about this record!". How satisfying to be reminded of great music after putting it down for years.

Put the lotion in the basket

Q Lazzarus licensing “Goodbye Horses” to The Silence of the Lambs was simultaneously their best and worst career move.

Boxes, man.

Why do we like boxes so much? I'm writing this post within a box and that box is in another box and that box is in another box while I'm sitting on a soft fabric box living inside a box within a larger box. Can't get enough of them.

the plan pt. 2

Why the plan makes sense to me. The Beatles put out quite a few terrible songs. But their output is part of what makes them great. Weezer puts out a lot of terrible songs and yet Rivers doesn't care, he still eats his candy with the pork and beans. You picking up what I'm putting down here?

the plan

I am going to release a new song every six-weeks.

The reasoning behind this:

1. I wait too long to put stuff out and then regret not releasing earlier.

2. How much better is a recording if sat on for many many years? How much better was that tenth mix? So many of the best records were put together in a short period of time. London Calling was recorded in two weeks (apparently). And some of the most mediocre records took way too long, see Chinese Democracy.

3. It will force me to be less precious.

4. It will force me to try new things. Experimentation and tinkering is the way to propel ourselves and society forward, see NN Taleb or Seth Godin for more my inspiration on this.

5. The six weeks timeline I got from that Basecamp dude who hates meetings, in his opinion one month is too short for small but substantial projects and multiple months is too long. Six weeks seems to be the sweet spot. It makes sense musically too. No time to wait for inspiration, before getting into the studio. Get into the studio and then be inspired. It also allows enough time to schedule with other players if needed and allows for ample time to play with mixes if song structure and recording is done within a month.

6. Announcing it here will hold me accountable and just as this blog has helped me write and expose my ideas to others often, this will hopefully help me do the same.

7. Making music is the best.

8. Wish me luck.

9. Stay tuned. blankcinema.com

Contrarians

When you’re younger there is such value in contradiction. As I get older I wonder how valuable it is, when it takes so long to change people’s minds for the better. Is Nietzsche that useful?

Focus

Focus is a very powerful skill, maybe the most important.

Compound effects

Passion can never be overrated, is consistency just as powerful?

Tony Clifton

Why do I feel like every time Kanye does something now, it’s just an Andy Kaufman bit? As if he’s here to mock our own outrage and overreaction, to remind us that life is absurd theatre. Laughter is the only healthy response.

Music

Making music with other people is some of the most fun you can have. Watch Stop Making Sense and you’ll see it’s a goddam party. Everyone sharing pieces of the whole idea, bouncing ideas and sounds off one another, feeling like your sharing the same brain.

Art

Art is engineering and design, and is mostly mechanical, but is fueled by inspiration.

Pop

I can’t think of any massive pop culture franchises that were made this century that weren’t pulled from content last century.

Send bitcoin

What lazy structures we’ve propped ourselves up with. And that’s okay, as long as we are okay with it.

Heroes

There was once a belief in me that I was a lone hero on a quest through dangerous lands. Now I just want to make sure I'm not creating any dangerous lands for other heroes.

flying

I need a full eight hours in a sensory deprivation tank, although when I finally come out I'll probably forget how to use my legs.

Adulthood

Once you realize that the adults you looked up to when you were a kid were also just making it up as they went along, you’re there.

Luddite

Resistance to technology in broad general terms, such as in the form of luddites, is a form of mental insanity. Progress is inevitable and acceptance is the only solution. Specific issues around technology and how they affect society need to be addressed, but as a general philosophy ludditism is non-sensical.

highlight

If you say something was a highlight of 2020, how good was it really?

Material girl

The tail end of Madonna’s career was a bit of a mess and I regret that. I think she deserved better.

Not ripe yet

I’m constantly adapting my schedule for an avocado.

Reintroduced to society

Have to start using those social muscles again. They’ve pretty much atrophied.

Expectations

It's getting easier and easier to drop any expectations of success in a given project. Which counterintuitively makes it easier to progress. If you don't hold the bar so high that you can't figure out how to reach it, it's pretty easy just to jump and see how high you get.

Me...the rest of the world

My mind is one apartment, a chill space with bean bag chairs, some lemon La Croix in the fridge and Brian Eno's Music for Airports on the phono. In the next apartment there's a raging party that has been going on for hours. The cops have been called, but now their just escalating the situation.

freedom

Through every botched practical application of social science there exists a mistrust in people. Fascism holds that an individual can and should not think for themselves, and must think and act in the same manner as its ruler. Communism/socialism holds that an individual must share equally with their community. Neither of these practical applications trust that an individual will act out of communal interest and self interest simultaneously. The two are not mutually exclusive. The practical application of these top down governments will not accept this paradox of the human spirit because it is born out of the rational mind. That is why stringent utopic ideals applied from the top down will always fail. Governments with the most flexibility for the individual will succeed. But you need a foundation for these individuals, healthcare, employment and housing. I'm out.

shadows

If I've never met you than you are a complete fiction in my mind. How is it that I have so many fictions in my life and so few realities. Generations before us I'm sure had plenty of fictions; gossip about other people they did not know, but never so much as now. Discussing theories about people we know nothing about. All shadows.

entrenched

Tribal skirmishes dominate the digital landscape. Connection has increased, understanding has decreased.

Monsters

Out of context everyone is a monster, within context everyone is a human being. If you are seeing a monster, you don’t know enough context.

Dumb metaphors

You can’t make an omelette without breaking a few eggs, but you can make scrambled tofu and no one gets hurt.

Bpm

When the rhythm of normalcy is no longer tapping away in the background, you have to find your own steady beat.

Fight Club

The one movie and book that had the biggest impact on my life was Fight Club. It not only shaped many of my beliefs about society, but even had an impact on some of my friendships as I was growing up, for better or worse.

It did not introduce me to a lot of concepts or ideas that I had never considered, but more that it presented those concepts as a game to be played and as real life with consequences simultaneously. Because of this it was incredibly dark/sad as well as funny/inspiring. It was fun to make-believe that you were going to start a revolution to overturn consumerist culture and globalist apathy, and it was also scary the more you pushed those concepts.

Over 20 years later, it feels incredibly relevant now.

"Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all that claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think every thing you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told to want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned."

"Only after disaster can we be resurrected. It's only after you've lost everything that you're free to do anything. Nothing is static, everything is evolving, everything is falling apart."

Pitchfork

In the 2000’s it was super lame to be really into things. I blame music blogs for this. Today it’s super cool to be really into things. I blame podcasts for this.

Complicated Cinematic Universe Timelines

This film’s story takes place during the time of the original trilogy, at the same time as the second installment, but more specifically just after the protagonist says “let’s get lunch.” And just before the heroine replies with “ok”.

Dragged

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. Unless you're on twitter, then fire away!

The space you inhabit pt.2

I’m at an 83% comfort with the space that I inhabit, 83% of me knows that I deserve to exist here. I feel like if I ever hit 100% I would die or become a psychopath, not sure how this works.

Eleven

Do shows like the X-Files still exist and I’m just not paying attention? Or was that a one-time awesome concept that no one has been able to recreate. I guess Stranger Things is pretty close, never mind.

Istanbul

I came to the realization that They Might Be Giants is basically a kids band, then I found out that they are in fact a kids band.

Just Don't Look

Lisa:
Hey, Springfield! Are you suffering from the heartbreak of monster-itis? Then take a tip from Mr. Paul Anka!

Paul Anka:
To stop those monsters, one-two-three
Here's a fresh new way that's trouble-free
It's got Paul Anka's guarantee

Lisa:
Guarantee void in Tennessee

Paul Anka and Lisa:
Just don't look! Just don't look! (x2)

Jet

Why do I find myself defending Paul McCartney? Shouldn’t he just get a free pass.

Order of things

First comes not caring what other people think. Then comes brilliance.

So 90’s

Isn’t tiktok so 90’s, like a 90’s board game, lip syncing challenges with your friends in your living room and then putting it all on vhs, doing the thing with the eyes. Even the logo. So 90’s.

Another one in the can

At some point your age really is just a number and has absolutely no relevance to what happens day to day. I’ve never felt younger, or older in my life. What does that mean? No clue. Here’s to me.

Why? pt. 2

Let's take this a step further. In the case of a single primary leader for an entire country, what actually changes in regards to laws, policies and funding, does not most of this have to be voted in via congress. What does putting a single face on this process do other than turn it into a drama vs. a bureaucratic process? If anything Trump has exposed the dangerous divisive nature of a single face to represent a top down government which involves thousands of people to function. It is well known that local government has more impact to your day to day life and the people and neighbourhoods you care about. He stands as the winner of the wrestling match, but his drama has brought to light what people have secretly known all along. That wrestling is fake. Unfortunately for the audience the blood being spilt is real.

All In

Does the world need more trolls, contrarians, or devil's advocates? Let's all just put our cards face up on the table.

Why?

Why do we need leaders? What use do they serve at this point? In the age of aggregators and Mechanical Turks.

Voltron

People are realizing how they can work together now on a global scale. A real movement is happening, it’s been a long time coming, but it’s here you can feel it, it’s palpable. Stay the course.

...

...

Public Shaming

If people keep overreacting to other people's viewpoints, no one will say anything for fear of shame and persecution.

News cycle

Like trying to fall sleep when you’re high. Never has the world felt so fascinating and so exhausting.

Head in the sand

Where did I go? Back into my own thoughts. Back into my own private world. Coming up for air only occasionally to see if things had changed.

Straight

The art of bullshitting is complicated and takes years to master, that’s why kids tell it to you straight.

Reset

Time to clear my head and start over again, I can’t tell if these posts are getting worse or better or staying the same. I thought it would get easier to write something everyday, I thought the inspiration would come quicker. Mostly I think it’s becoming more and more difficult.

Spectacle

I think it’s more interesting to view social media as a large sculpture we’re all slapping bits of clay onto, like a collective art project, rather than a form of direct communication. It justifies its showiness this way.

More than semantics

What you don’t say can be just as important. The music is in the space between the notes too.

Paradigm Lost

“Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.” - Tony Robbins.

I'm thinking of this quote and how it relates to change not on a personal level, but on mass scale, revolutions. The pain of what is and the pain of what was is no longer acceptable. It's messy to change and it's only going to get messier, but hopefully change is seen through until the end, until the current status quo becomes alien. A paradigm shift.

Unconscionable

If something is too difficult for the human mind to comprehend, maybe it’s meant to be left that way.

Potato potato pt.2

Semantics do matter, insofar as how people are interpreting what you are saying, but they do not matter nearly as much as attitude and action. Semantics determine your followers, everything else determines your legacy.

Comedy

Being a a good standup comic is an exceptional talent. A solo live performance without props or instruments for one hour, no breaks, getting the audience to react consistently in a very specific way. What a feat that is?

Level ground

Criticism for certain wealthy people often comes only from a place of jealously. If one wealthy person criticizes another it is instantly more valid.

Born this way pt. 2

I think I was a bit callous on this subject 2 days ago. What I was getting at was the fact that in music more than any other art form people rip off melodies, lyrics and beats all the time and it's rarely punished as copyright infringement. There are only a few cases of this and even then I find the music making public sympathetic to the defendants. I think musicians have an inherent understanding that just because we came up with the melody does not mean that we own it forever more. That it must transform and evolve to reach its potential.

Ill Communication

The result of bad communication is anxiety. Pieces of information left unclear or scrambled leave the receiver confused and unsettled. That's why good communication is often the deciding factor for employers. It matters more than skill or education.

Born this way

When writing songs, it’s very easy to rip people off and usually not that frowned upon. So why not do it!

Potato potato

Most of my disagreements revolve around semantics, so why even bother disagreeing? There’s nothing fundamental here. It’s all just practice for a real disagreement.

A wise man once told me

Don’t argue with fools. Because people from a distance can’t tell who is who.

tokens

There's an ocean of self we keep secret from even our closest friends. That's okay, we'll hand out small pieces as gifts every now and then.

Get this party started

I always feel like I’m giving Pink either too much credit, or not enough. This is something I need to resolve.

Zen and the art of the basketball

The Last Dance was more spiritual / philosophical than I expected. References to Jordan always being in the moment, creating mental motivations for himself that may or may not have actually happened, never thinking about missing a shot, overcoming mental and physical pain (both him and Scottie) and of course Phil Jackson’s gravitation towards Native American wisdom and spirituality, which guided his relationship as Rodman’s coach.

Unfollow

If I unfollow you, don’t take it personally. It doesn’t mean I don’t like you as a person. I don’t like the life you’ve curated for my entertainment.

Be my little baby

Remember when pop music was about kisses and hugs? Neither do I, I was born in the eighties.

Masterclass

Is it too late to learn biochemistry so that I can feel like I have some sort of control in this situation? They have online courses for that right?

Dear world,

When can things feel normal again?
World: Let us get back to you on that.

I drink it up!

The selfish seem a little bit bolder than they once were. If Daniel Plainview did not have a cheery and professional front upon first introduction.

Hindsight

The progression of my inner dialogue through every milestone my child accomplishes. “This is going to take a while.”, “How do you not get this by now?”, “WOW you got that really quick! That’s amazing!”

Facetok

Apple you thought were so smart with this Face ID, didn’t you? Now everyone has to wear masks. Where’s my Touch ID? Gone...gone forever. You blew it.

Couples retreat

Some days I can do this for another year, other days I can’t do it another minute. If we approach it like a creative retreat, like something we inflicted upon ourselves, and I suppose in a way we did, we can handle it. Like running a marathon, taking a vow of silence.

Bottleneck

One fear can stop a million ideas.

Sliders

Making the best of an alternate reality.

Crickets

That joke isn’t funny anymore. The Smiths knew what was up. Bad jokes tire quickly when they are about exhausting situations. I’m anti-censorship, no one should stop you from saying your dumb joke. But maybe we should all just collectively let the crickets enjoy this one.

Useless

I guess we know how useless guns are now, you can’t even get your job back with them.

Another day at the office

Are we starting to get more lax when it comes to this social distancing stuff? Now that it feels like a job you don’t really want to do. Maybe you’re not always 6 feet apart from one another. You’re not washing your hands as often, you don’t wipe everything down with sanitizer before it comes in your house. A subtle protest, like stealing pens from work or showing up late for a meeting.

Stoicism

How often would I rather just be silent than speak? Is there safety in silence. Maybe it holds us back, maybe it saves us.

We see you

Killer bees trying to rebrand themselves as murder hornets.

Groan

Everything is so sanitized these days.

Click

In the plot of the terrible Adam Sandler movie Click, a magical TV remote gives Sandler’s character the ability to fast forward through parts of his life he deems boring, monotonous or painful. As he does this with more and more frequency, his life quickly unravels as the remote begins to learn and predict which parts of his life he’d like to skip over. Eliminating any opportunity for growth and development, he ends up losing everything he held dear. The lesson: What is most valuable in this life is found by understanding and accepting the hardship and pain associated with achieving and overcoming obstacles. All that being said, I’d really like to fast forward the hell out of this nonsense right now.

a beautiful mess

My son is failing incredibly lately while talking and it's making me happy. Not because he's falling back on his development, he's not. But because he's extending himself much farther. No longer is he putting two or three words together simply and succinctly to get his wants across. He's aiming for full sentences with descriptive words, and colloquial additions, he's telling a story and he's just bulldozing through all of it while picking up a few extra syllables here and there and dropping a few others on the way, and half the time I have no idea what he's saying.

no holds barred

I became interested in coding after getting into Silicon Valley and Mr. Robot, then The Big Short got me really interested in trading. As a kid wasn't this the same, after watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Karate Kid, didn't you want to kick your friend in the face, or arm wrestle after watching Over the Top?

Party lines

American politics is a black hole. Like a black hole, it’s gravity is crushing, at a certain point there is no escape. Was there ever a time when it wasn’t a black hole? Civil wars, assassinations, impeachments; all par for the course. How many Canadian prime ministers have been assassinated?

Rip

The living have taken over the cemetery. It’s all we have.

Because we care

When gratitude and loyalty are expected responses from an individual to a corporation, the implication is that the corporation is doing something for you out of kindness. How often is kindness the motivation for a corporate entity, even in charity? People are mostly good, but a company is soulless by design, and there’s nothing wrong with that, as it is an abstract construct, just don’t let branding fool you.

Darwin

I know things are not quite normal, but they are starting to feel less strange. I underestimated our ability to adapt.

He's not wrong

If Lysol kills viruses, injecting yourself with Lysol would kill the virus, or inhaling large amounts of any disinfectant, bleach, would kill the virus in your lungs as well. I suppose setting yourself on fire would kill it. Or if you could fire a gun and aim it directly at one of the virus particles on your skin or in your blood you might be able to eliminate it. Standing on the surface of the sun would probably kill it too. Talk to your doctor first.

Stockholm Syndrome

Do you think we'll miss it? Being forced to stay at home, being separated from others. In some small way. I always liked indoor recess as a kid, maybe that's why I might...just a little.

Irony is a circle

Toto's Africa was a bit of a joke, now it's awesome. It started with Dax Shepherd and Kristen Bell, then Stranger Things, then Weezer. Now we just blast it full volume.

Metalocalypse

Running through the cemetery at dusk, listening to Master of Puppets, a black cat stares me down.

Perspectives

I have to believe that people mean to do good. Even if the chasm between what I believe is the right thing to achieve that good and what they believe is the right thing to achieve that good is so vast.

Celebrities are angels

They are here to tell us how to feel. And how to move on in times of hardship and difficulty.

It’s a 2 party system, you have to vote for one of us

Beliefs can act as signals for other beliefs, which means that you may end up being lumped into categories that don’t suit you. Examine each belief, each perspective, is it worth holding on to? You will be judged by your twitter feed.

I Failed the Test

I failed the test and yet here I am still working. Who is the test for, what is it for? If you are testing to find employees you may not be finding the right employees. But of course only someone who failed the test would respond like that.

Be ice cream, or be nothing.

Got a great hair cut last night from my wife. Last night, hair. Tomorrow we'll learn how to hunt and skin a deer, after that who knows, build a hut maybe, start a new civilization. We're finally free from the shackles of modernity and all its inherent dependences. We'll all be Ron Swansons by the end of this.

Flat Earth Tonight

I want to start a conspiracy theory blog or channel in the style of the Colbert Report, completely ironic. The problem is that it will get popular for all the wrong reasons, just like the Colbert Report.

El-lee-otttttt

You can’t help but feel what your child feels, every fall, every scrape, every frustration, every joy, and every laugh. It’s an instantaneous 1:1 empathetic ratio, like E.T. and Eliot.

Maze runner

We’re living through the early part of a backstory for a young adult dystopian sci-fi novel.

Rosie

Compartmentalization is no longer possible, accepting the fact that work and home life are intermingled and inseparable. I can no longer distinguish between activities. Maybe this is the way it is meant to be. Pre-industrial revolution style. We'll all be encouraged to go back to work, but will want to stay home. The opposite of women in the workforce after WWII.

Loser.

Last night I dreamt that someone complimented my air guitar. One can dream...

The plot of Snow White makes no sense

The Evil Queen in Snow White wants to be the fairest.  Yet, she makes Snow White fall asleep forever peacefully contained in a glass case and she herself drinks a potion which turns her ugly and old.

bran garbage

My wife has pointed out the numerous grammar mistakes in these posts. It's called brain garbage. That being said said, I should probably get grammarly....shes not wrong.

You, me and Dupree

Some times Owen Wilson, is just way too Owen Wilson for me to Owen Wilson.

Puzzles and TV

I don’t need friends, restaurants, communal spaces, or large gatherings to have a good time! I can make my own fun.

6.2

I gave myself a rating of 6.2 yesterday. As a human, taking in account all of humanity. Which seemed brutal at first. But if you put Jesus and Buddha on this scale at around 9.8, 9.9 or so, (not 10, they weren’t perfect either) and hitler below 1 somewhere. 0.2 maybe. I think 6.2 is pretty good rating, in fact...it might be too high.

Practice

It’s difficult to stand up for your beliefs especially when they are small and can be dismissed. I know I can’t stand by my minor convictions under pressure, but maybe it’s good practice to do so, those big ones rarely need to be defended.

House Arrest

I have nothing to talk about because I’ve been inside working and discussing TV shows and social media all day. I have to replenish the well. Time to go see a concert or go to an art gallery. Haha. We’re all going to die.

There’s a great JG Ballard short story where two volunteers have decided to participate in an experiment to remove their ability to sleep. They start noticing that the room is becoming smaller and smaller until, in their minds, the room and then are squashed into a singularity and the one supervising the experiment watches them suddenly become vegetables.

That’s how I’m starting to feel right now...I’m too pretty for jail-time.

Strange days

Strange times we live in, I keep hearing people say that. Was there ever a time lived in that was not strange? We keep moving the goal post forward into weirder and wilder terrain, because I guess we’d die of boredom if we didn’t.

Standby

I am taking my connections with people for granted less these days. Having an option breeds complacency, today is too busy, there’s always a chance to reach out to that person tomorrow. When you can no longer meet up with a friend for a coffee, or a drink, when that option has been removed indefinitely, you realize that you never had any option. The complacency and comfort you felt was an illusion. You are either in the act of connecting or you are not. Your circle is either engaged with you in a moment or they are not. There is no standby mode.

flight patterns

How will human behaviour evolve from this? We are all distancing ourselves, keeping 2 meters apart, moving in circles at the grocery store, will this behaviour be ingrained in us now as a survival instinct, will we hesitate for a moment before giving someone a handshake or a hug, wondering what is being transferred, who we could be unintentionally harming in the process.

Hashtagfamouspeople

Famous people don’t need to use hashtags. Unless it’s for charity. Hashtagfamouspeople.

Huh?

The dust shakes off eventually and we all turn into diamonds or some other metaphor.

Strangers

To always depend on the kindness of strangers is insane, being pleasantly surprised by it every once in a while seems to work for me.

now or never

I am so often repelled by the things I read that it makes me not want to participate in the discussion. Now I'm worried that if I don't speak, I'll lose the opportunity.

Creature Feature

How many documentaries, feature films, tv miniseries and books will be written about this moment in history and how many will be released this year or next? And we’ll watch as if we hadn’t lived it.

Relief

We’ll have to do this again sometime, without the death and disease, where the entire production wheel comes to a grinding halt for a little while.

Acca-scuse-me?!

The Pitch Perfect Trilogy rules! It's like the first Bring It On, only better... if you can imagine that. John Michael Higgins and Elizabeth Banks kill it. "my time is like a toddler in tiara...precious and short" - Keegan-Michael Key in Pitch Perfect 2. That's right, that line is from the sequel. Get into it.

surreal

What does it mean to say something is surreal? We only got real. Waking life is real, dreams are real. We can’t classify something as more or less real. A simulation is real, if there’s an afterlife, that will be real too.

chill

There is an idea that says if you work really hard and focus on your goals, good things will happen for you.

I'd like to rephrase this. Chill the eff out and do what interests you, share it with others, don't take any of it too seriously, chances are, no one's listening, no one cares, and we're all going to die soon anyways... Amen.

more nonsense

Can't we all just get along, separately, at a safe distance?

little miss sunshine

Is Sufjan Stevens gone forever? Did his gentle indie stylings just bless us with their presence in the mid-oughties and then disappear forever? Maybe the future isn’t twee, maybe only the past is. What in the hell am I talking about?

print it

'Why Can't We Be Friends' by War, has two small mistakes in the intro. It must be one of the most popular intros in all of pop music and yet they left the mistakes in. Did the mistakes make it popular, does that subtle bit of humanity and humility lend itself to reference so easily? If they were larger mistakes, or if the mistakes didn't exist, would it be as popular? When do you sand the edges off, when do leave them sharp and honest? When it's so tempting to edit and clean, when do you print as is? Does it matter? Are we all just rolling the dice?

Ozymandias

Ironically this is the only time I've ever truly felt like a citizen of the world. We are all united in this plight. This is not a national issue, not a racial issue, not a class issue. Maybe this is what the world needs in some twisted Watchmen way.

Xoxo

Dear life, keep being awesome, even in times of insanity. Best plague ever. Having a lovely time. This was supposed to be an in depth analysis about how the show Gossip Girl is a modern allegory for the life of F. Scott Fitzgerald, but I’ve had a very enjoyable Saturday. Stay healthy, wash your hands, and binge watch Gossip Girl.

fear is indecision

When people don't know what to do it makes them scared. Give them a task and the fear disappears. Even if the threat remains.

black swan

A black swan is an unpredictable event that is beyond what is normally expected of a situation and has potentially severe consequences. Black swan events are characterized by their extreme rarity, their severe impact, and the widespread insistence they were obvious in hindsight. - Jim Chappelow - Investopedia 

https://www.investopedia.com/terms/b/blackswan.asp

Black Swan and Anti-Fragile were two of my favourite books consumed last year. These are 2 of 5 books in Nassim Nicholas Taleb's Incerto series. I enjoyed Skin in the Game as well, but these two drove the message home for me. Now is a good a time as any to read them. You won't be going out much.

Walk

If you think a goal or possibility is out of reach, it’s impossible to take the first step, there’s no motivation. If your goal is as close as walking to the store, you don’t think twice about it. Everything can be a walk to the store.

Wind

A discussion today brought to light the impact of this current pandemic, although I put little stock in the gravity of this, it was made clear how mass reactions to something so tiny, smaller than a cell, can change history. The wind blows and the whole world is tossed around with it.

No Request Party

No requests, I'm spinning this record for me thanks.

Personal oath

I promise myself I will never worry about anything ever.

Giants pt. 2

Maybe I can say that a little more clevererer and a little more adage-y. 
If you compare yourself to giants you’ll always lose. If you appreciate their company, they might let you stand on their shoulders.

Yeah...that was a good.

Giants

I hold myself to high standards and compare myself to giants. Maybe the only way to reach those standards is to be thankful that these giants exist, and what they give. It certainly feels better than making comparisons.

Let's keep it simple

Everything is easy until it isn't. Everything is simple 'til it's not. Everything makes sense until it doesn't anymore. Let's keep it simple.

hustle and flow quote

There are two types of people: those that talk the talk and those that walk the walk. People who walk the walk sometimes talk the talk but most times they don't talk at all, 'cause they walkin'.

other people

Building versions of other people in your mind; what they’re thinking, what they want, and how they’ll react to you, is pointless and dangerous. Decide who you are, step forward, and let them decide who they are.

You'ren't /jɔː(r)nt/

You can make a contraction out of 'you are' ("you're") and 'are not'("aren't"). So you can make a contraction out of 'you are not'. You'ren't /jɔː(r)nt/ . I'm Shakespeare.

the future is twee

My wife was re-reading my one-liners to me and I still find them hilarious. If you can make yourself laugh really hard at something, that no one else is laughing at or even gets why it's funny, it becomes that much more hilarious. You are simultaneously laughing at how insane or how stupid you are. Not sure which one.

master of reality

The nightly news is poisonous to your mental health. Panic is induced instantly, when you hear about some viral outbreak, as your child coughs in the next room. It's not an outbreak, it's just being sick, it's not markets in free-fall, it's a good deal on stocks if you're smart enough to take advantage of it, he's not the next president, just some asshole with a few gaudy hotels. When we hyperbolize everything, we separate ourselves from reality, frame by frame, creating gods, demons, martyrs and sensation.

 

Infinite content

These crave ads are slowly wearing me down. If everyone shares their crave account and everyone shares their Netflix account and everyone shares their Spotify account and everyone shares their Prime account. I think we can get infinite content down to the price of water.

worlds

The Dark Tower series was my favourite book series, I remember reading the ending and being disappointed, now I can't even remember what the ending was like. I've started listening to an audiobook in the series that takes place somewhere in the middle, written after the others. And it really doesn't matter what the ending was like because I'm enjoying it. Stories are so much more than a beginning a middle and an end. They're worlds and histories and characters above all else.

Denial

I didn’t care much about my work situation until it started to change, and I started to change it. I think it was something I pushed aside because I didn’t want to think about it. How many things do we say we don’t care about that we actually need to change. What else am I subconsciously ignoring?

random

Some random one-liner brain garbage. I thought these were hilarious when I thought of them. Now ... meh. Also highlights the issue I have with Will Smith which no one else seems to comprehend, my horror when someone eats pizza with a knife and fork and how much I love the word twee, and dislike 'the future is...'

The world needs more will Smith. Wait....that doesn’t sound right.

Crime is always at the top of the crime chart in America.

If you are eating pizza with a fork, it’s either not very good pizza or you are bad at eating.

Plant based sausage party.

The future is twee.

Iain M Banks, you spell your name wrong.

Popup

Don’t try to surf, don’t do it. The less you do, the more you do. Let’s see you popup. Popup! That’s not it at all, do less, get down. Let’s see you do it again. Popup. No. Too slow. Do less. Popup. Popup. You’re doing too much get down. Popup. No. Remember don’t do anything. Get down. Popup. No, we’ll you gotta do more than that.

Kunu knows.

roasts

A roast only works if the person enjoys being roasted. If you aren't enjoying it, what are you doing? Also, it just makes the roaster look mean, and they're not, they're doing you a favour, providing you with a gift. Take it gracefully. Laugh at yourself, it takes a lot of courage to brutally mock someone to their face, respect it.

 

bus guy

Someone got on the bus today and couldn’t figure out how to tap his card on the reader, after many failed attempts he said to the driver “I’m not a bus guy”. But that is exactly the type of thing that a bus guy would say.

The space you inhabit

At what point are you 100% comfortable with taking up the physical space you are in? The essence of self-worth. I’m mostly there, 80-90% comfortable with saying "I deserve this space”.