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Everything...

I feel like these pieces of brain garbage when strung together are starting to develop their own tone, separate from a stream of consciousness. Now I've started naturally to write what only fits into that tone. It's still me, but filtered. Everything in its right place.


Idols

Why is it that losing celebrities feels like losing someone we know? Even if they are lost to us because of crimes, sexual misconduct, disgraced and shunned from the limelight, even if deservedly so, there's still a sense of loss, for the people we thought they were, the ideals we fashioned for them to fit into, now gone.


Mantra

This moment was made for you, by you.

Take a moment to enjoy it, always accept it, then ask yourself

"what am I trying to tell myself?"



The Choice of a New Generation

I think the battle of generations is primarily fought between 20-30 and 50-60. Maybe this is where the distance in the understanding of the world is concretely realized.

Maybe I never full joined the battle because familial generation party-line was divided across a few lines. My older brothers being born in the 70s myself being born in the 80s and having a niece born at the tail end of what is considered millennials on the cusp of Gen Z being raised in our home at the same time I was becoming a teenager.

A generational divide never made too much sense to me then, and it doesn't now.

The way we are currently judging what defines these generations is through how they most commonly consume media. If you can separate yourself from that, then you are free from those divides.

If you think the previous generation handed you a raw deal, and you live in the western world, you're probably wrong.

If you think kids have it easy these days, you're probably wrong too.

Give up the fight, every struggle is relative and individual, and most of them are not that different. The struggle to be heard, understood and to make a difference.



Ill Communication

Everything is communication.

Friday, it hit me with clarity that my current role was to make sure two machines were communicating with each other properly, that they understood each other. At first this made feel a bit inhuman, soulless. Then I realized that the purpose of these two machines talking to one another was that so a few people had the ability to communicate with many, many, more people. It was a chain, a person on one end, a string of machines, then another person on the other end. That is all we are doing, sending messages. The value of the message is everything.



Self Contained

Some friendships don't need a common ground, a common interest, or even a common set of beliefs. Some friendships just exist in a vacuum without anything keeping them alive. They are completely self contained. They have no reason for being. Yet there they are. Sometimes these are the ones that last the longest, because they never had anything propping them up to begin with.


Blindness

I'm starting to realize that everyone is smarter than you at something and dumber than you at something else. Someone new to the problem will often point out a solution that others have overlooked. Sometimes answers are there in our faces and we are continuously looking around and under them for a more useful or inventive solution. When you're floating around in space and your pen is not working, just use a pencil.


Oscars

Here’s a random one line interpretation of some Oscar nominated films, see if you can guess the movie, play along at home. These aren’t all the movies in every major category, there’s no logic here, I’m just being an idiot.

Sweet report Kylo Ren.

Hey buddy, whaddaya say we get a couple beers, smoke some acid and rewrite a little history.

How long does it take to kill Al Pacino.

I don’t know, this is a war movie, it’ll probably win. Cuz not enough war movies have won Oscars.

Taxi Driver....but with a clown.

Biopic. Sad.

Biopic. Inspirational.

Wasn’t this nominated 20 years ago? Did it win then? It won’t now.

Popes.

Sweet divorce Kylo Ren.

Scarlett Johansson is in every movie now?

This seems like a Soderbergh film... is it?

Babes.

This reminds me of that movie from the 90s with Michael J Fox ... Greedy, only good. This looks awesome actually, I really want to see it. Subtitles though.


Game shows

Are we entering a new era of game shows?

Every night there's a new game show on TV. Are cable networks just throwing whatever they can at the wall to see what sticks? Live entertainment is now on your phone, on demand quality content is on Netflix, Crave and Prime, but where do you find the game shows? Cable. They're cheap, they're weekly. The last ditch effort of a dying medium.

The Masked Singer is awesome though.



Drugs and Literature

Watching The Basketball Diaries...DiCaprio was a great actor from the beginning. How many people are that good from the start? Again, maybe acting isn't that difficult. It doesn't matter, DiCaprio is amazing in this at 20, 21? Jim Carroll was a junkie, a poet, an author, and was in a band. So New York.

I'm not too interested in reading books like this anymore, after you've read some Burroughs, Welsh and Bukowski, you're like, okay, it's hard being effed up all the time, I get it. You feel like an insect...got it.

That being said I think Naked Lunch is a masterpiece and almost totally incoherent. One of those rare reads where not just the plot, not just the tone, not just the content, but the format in which it is presented is so unique that it stands alone. American Psycho is in this category too. Completely unique.



Spoilers

I watched Joker the other night and I'm still not sure how I feel about it. I think it was a good movie. Maybe. It had all the collective parts of a good movie, but something felt missing.

I could feel the influences coming at me almost every other shot Taxi Driver, King of Comedy, American Psycho. Maybe a little Requiem for a Dream here and there. There were many scenes that I thought were incredible. But I didn't quite get what this movie added to the Batman story or even to the culture as a whole.

The Joker's origin story has always been a bit hazy, mysterious, perhaps deliberately so. Maybe the problem I had was that it tried to nail that story down so clearly. Here is why the Joker is unstable, here is why the Joker is a villain, he is actually a sympathetic character with mental illness, who went off of his medication. Okay...I guess that makes sense. But part of what is likeable about the Joker, the most iconic villain of all time, is that he seems like he's having a good time doing terrible things, we only really start to feel that near the very end and by then, the tragedies that he has endured are still fresh in our minds. Jaoquin's performance was fantastic, most of the cinematography was great, I liked the music as well. I'm just not sure I liked the movie. Maybe I'm not supposed to.

The tone was soooo dark. But is that the end goal of a superhero movie, just more darkness to legitimize the content. Did it need to take place in the DC universe at all? The parts involving the Wayne family seemed tacked on. Did we need to see Bruce's parents get killed? Couldn't this just have been Taxi Driver: The Clown Version? Or a stand alone Joker origin story. I'm still wrestling with this. On technical points alone it's Certified Fresh, but on gut reaction, I'm not so sure. And I think gut has more weight on this scale.



10 Pages

Stephen King has written a lot of books. Some of them are great, some of them okay. Which got me thinking. If you write as much as Stephen King, you're bound to have a few hits. I'm told he writes 10 pages a day. That's 3650 pages a year, even if those books are the size of It or The Stand, that's 3 massive books a year. You want to be Stephen King? Write 10 pages a day.


Pure Entropy

I wanted to keep it pure, everything pure. And yet nothing can be. Erosion is pure, rust is pure, decay is pure.



Final Act

Dreams are not always one offs. Sometimes they are sequels or prequels or part of a larger cinematic universe. Last night I had a dream in a setting that had already been used once or twice in previous dreams. The scene played out differently than the previous instalments. I said goodbye to the backdrop, I don't think I'll be dreaming about it again. But, you can never be sure.


Polish

I was having a discussion about great mixes with a friend of mine and a point that he made was that to an extent, mixing really doesn't matter, as long as its decent enough sounding, it's not as important as people make it out to be.

We both went on to cite examples of great new and classic records with terrible mixes. I would extend this to almost everything. A great editor doesn't write the book, special effects don't make the movie. And now more than ever I also think consistency, and/or reliable output can be weighted above all else. Not just the artistry or intention of a work, but a continuous striving to achieve more, reach higher, and to stop polishing last nights work, it's already stale.



Big ups

I'm starting to come around, I think Chet Hanks is my favourite Hanks...besides Tom.

It must be difficult living in the shadow of someone accomplished like that. Take Jakob Dylan for instance, he wrote some fantastic songs and put out a great record, but how can it possible hold a candle, your crotchety old man wrote "All Along the Watchtower", you may as well have been a magician. If Jakob were anyone else's son he would have his own identity, and notable music career, but nope, not even close.

What if Chet Hanks turns out to be the next Eminem, will he be take seriously? I will answer that for you, he will not. Maybe it's the last great hurdle for rappers. Kanye made rappers with Polo shirts from the suburbs cool. Drake made former actors on Degrassi TNG cool. Maybe that's Chet Hanks' barrier to break down.

I'm going to start celebrating the black sheep. Why is Colin Hanks a great Hanks? I mean, I loved Orange County, but basically we're getting a mini Tom at a discount rate. Chet... we don't what we're getting, I'll buy that ticket every time. Big ups.



Likes

Social media has never felt legitimate to me. Maybe because it was conceived at the end of my high school life, with the dawn of friendster and myspace, it still feels like high school. I don’t get the jokes, I don’t get the lingo, (oh is that how we say something is cool now…oh okay). It always feels forced to me and I’m always wondering about who this new cool kid is that commented on some other cool kids post. It’s my own insecurity I guess because I can’t just pretend to get it, it feels fun and funny sometimes, but through gritted teeth and a grimace. This turns me into a passive viewer, unwilling to participate even when I feel inclined to do so.

I’m just not there any more, I used to care about being cool, everyone does, to deny that is simply virtue signalling a different kind of cool. I don’t think it needs to be brought down or that its ruining society or anything like that, it’s just not for me right now. Maybe it will be one day.

Another way to look at social media is different kinds of cliques or clubs, if you analyze the language used for each platform it is very distinct it has distinct tone and a distinct sound. When you are among a group of friends that you’ve known your whole life you fall into that pattern of talking, a rhythm a cadence, you use certain words more than others, this is natural.

On social media, it is not natural, but it still exists, Reddit has a different tone than twitter, facebook has a different tone than instagram and so on, 4chan, this is partly due to the users that dominate each platform, as well as the platforms inherent functionality.

Engage in reddit long enough and you’ll probably feel like a know it all, engage in twitter long enough and you’ll think you are quick witted, enough IG and you’ll think the whole world is living a better life than you. It’s all a show, none of its real.

I suppose this isn’t real either, just another show, and more virtue signalling, "the anti-marketing angle, that's a good angle," maybe I'm only comfortable because I can't tell if people are reading it, maybe I'll install analytics to get that endorphin rush, but it feels like it’s more on my terms. No likes.



Education

‘It doesn’t matter what you get in algebra at all, unless you’re going to be an algebratrician.’ - Chris D’Elia

I've been reading a lot of Seth Godin lately, along with other people who aren't crazy about our current educational system (Peter Thiel). It makes me question how I'll approach educational choices for my son. I generally trust that he'll learn what he needs to learn through experience, and will be inspired by the fields that interest him. But should I take actions to change the trajectory? Home school, private school, Waldorf, Montessori. Will it make a difference? Should he have a bit of everything? Or will he find the path to a life of curiosity and perpetual learning through his own will, regardless of the structural template he's placed in for a few hours a day?



actorslashrapperslash

Rap music is all about attitude and nothing else, Kanye’s lyrics are mostly idiotic, but when he yells ‘heeuuuuuh’ it’s hard not to get into it.

I would extend this to all types of music but rap more than any other. I think this is why rappers can make great actors, they’ve already honed an attitude and a character. Another question would be why is it easier for musicians to become actors but not the other way around.

See Scarlett Johansson, and Keanu Reeves. Exceptions to this rule Drake and Childish Gambino. Maybe rapping and acting is interchangeable, but not rock and acting.

Maybe Jeremy Renner will dismantle this theory.



infinite loop

For the previous post “thanks again”, I don’t know Apple's predictive implementation is some how a reflection of what I usually type on my phone, machine learning that has custom tailored the next plausible word for me to use, or a default generic English speaking businessaterian.

The feedback loop is always in production always beta testing offering different reflections of me to myself and checking for accuracy. With this in mind, is there a threshold where technology will know me so well as to gratify all wishes and desires the second or even slightly before they come to the surface of my mind?



Thanks again

Thanks again to all of the guys that work on this week and to be sure we can get together for sure thanks again thanks so you can be sure you can get them done and get it out of your way and then you get a chance thanks again thanks.

This message was brought to you buy Apple’s word prediction. Thanks again.



Lemons

If a day is not going well, sometimes it’s best to cut your losses and start fresh. Not everyone wants your lemonade. Yesterday it felt like road blocks were magically appearing for me, I took my cue and ran away, the benefits of being a contract remote employee.



Interviews

People hate job interviews, but I’m starting to think they are the best part of any job. If you get the job then it’s just a job, if you don’t then you need to find another job. The interview is the only point where you can see the potential and the value of yourself in a certain role without actually working there, also, if interviewed correctly, illustrates what you will learn from that job. 



Blue

My child is obsessed with the color blue, I wonder where and how this starts, this rampant adoration for one of an array to choose from. Something must have struck him that this color is so interesting and fascinating that it must be discussed above all other colors.


Potential

Intelligence means nothing. It’s what you are doing that means something. Potential has no value because it is common.


Dream

I think it’s important to give yourself as much space to let your mind wander as possible. If you stare at the walls to long, they start to close in.



Importance

I’m getting paid more now than I’ve ever been paid in my life, now that I'm being paid more the less important money is to me. Importance can then be seen as an indication of lack. If your health is important it’s because there is a threat of weakness. Or if this job is important there is a fear that this job will be taken away from you. When you realize that money is not important, it comes when it comes, this job is not important, the next one will come, nothing is important, then you hold all the cards, you are willing to take risks, hold out and do what you want.



Globes

Ricky Gervais was the best thing about the Golden Globes, his daring made the rest of the show seem trudging and rote. The audience reaction revealed how stuffy the relaxed version of the Oscars actual is.


Books

I'm compiling a list of all the books I've read or listened to this past year.

Zero to One, The Startup Way, Black Swan, Anti-Fragile, Skin in the Game, White, So You've Been Publicly Shamed, Bitcoin Billionaires, The Big Short, ReWork, The $100 Startup.

Last year I probably read only one book, maybe 2 at most, the year before that, nothing. I've fallen in love with reading again. You can tell where my interests are leaning by the content.



Meditation

"All science is physics or stamp collecting." - Ernest Rutherford

There are variations on this sentiment regarding physics as the father of all science, or the only real science, because all understanding in other scientific fields is derived from the understanding that the laws of physics provide.

In the realm of self-improvement I would extend this same quality to meditation, if you start with this, all other improvements will eventually follow. Committing to a daily practice of meditation for only a few minutes every day has changed my life over the last two years, in all areas of my life. But it started with meditation, everything else is stamp collecting.



Parenting

Parenting is silently convincing yourself of the reassuring statements you make aloud.


Punk Rock is Capitalist

Punk rock is capitalist, DIY and aggressively self-centred.

The revolutionary rock of the 60's is socialist, communal, free and inclusive.

New Wave basks lazily in its conservative wealth.

Grunge is introspective.

I've always been attracted to Punk Rock.